Monday, January 31, 2011

اعلان باندا فى المكتب

I thought with all of the turmoil in Egypt right now, people might not be considering all of the assets that have been emanating out of Egypt, such as Panda Cheese. I mean, first off, it's cheese, which is superfluously formidable, and It is represented by the greatest of all Asian bears, the panda. And you can't say no to panda.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Julian Casablanca

Everyone was wearing fingerless gloves.
Doesn't this just radiate awesomeness? If you don't already know, this is a skit from SNL, and it features Julian Casablanca, the foreman for my favorite band, The Strokes, and the owner of the coolest name in the world (except for maybe Max Fightmaster). You can see him rocking the fingerless gloves next to Andy Samberg. I will devote the time for a real blog post later, probably tomorrow, because I saw Law Abiding Citizen again, a very chill movie. Anyway, the name of the skit is "Boombox".
Yeah, he's pointing at you.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Light-House Italian

Oh-hoho. How humorous.
Okay, Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side!
Two jokes in one day? I know. Unreal.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Comic Monday!

It's comic Monday! So here is a comic!

Well, It made sense in my head... anyway, you should check out all the greatest jokes at Anti-Jokes.com, such as "What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers." oh-hohoho

Sunday, January 23, 2011

The Perry Bible Fellowship

So on the internet, I found the greatest webcomic ever called, you guessed it, The Perry Bible Fellowship. There are quite a few comics, enough to keep you busy for a while, although they do not update all that often. Anyway, I have picked a few of my favorites. So just click them to read them.
You do need to click them for them to become a readable size.
Of course this one has a bear, so I have to include this one.

Of course, All of the comics are good, And this guy's style varies, but all are just so excellent. I did not make any of these comics, but Nicholas Gurewitch did. Anyway, check out the website, which you can find here.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Oh, Those Dutch.

While looking for new things to post, I stumbled upon a bunch of photos from Holland, and I found this.

For some reason, their cereal is slightly different. Like for instance, Snap, Crackle and Pop are a lot cooler. And made out of clay. I mean, look. they are just so amazing. And while on the topic of Dutch food, if you ever get the chance, you should find some Kinder chocolate, for is is the greatest ever. Speaking of which, If you ever get a chance to find the french soft drink Gini, buy it. It is the most ineffable drink you will ever consume.
More magic than a real genie.
You will be blown away by its flavor. It cannot even be put into words.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Cleverbot?

False.
Oh Cleverbot. You and your ways. And for those of you who have never been to cleverbot, it is just an AI chat thing. If you have sunk below chatting with real friends and people on omegle, yes, you can chat with your computer. But there is a plus side, It is slightly less stupid than the people on omelge.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Angry Birds Review

Well, Angry birds has been the #1 app in the app store for months now. I do not know why. Angry birds is not that great of a game. For many reasons, it is a good game, but the cons outweigh the pros. The fact that there are many many levels is a great thing. Most games get old fast because of the lack of content, but Angry Birds has hours upon hours of content.  It is also "physics" based, which is pretty cool. and the physics are not that bad. Sometimes not entirely realistic, but hey. Also there are the achievements and high score table through Open Feint, which makes it fun to compare scores with friends. It is also cheap. It gets annoying when all of the great apps are five dollars. It is well deserved, for a portable realistic driving game, or Call of Duty, but the cheaper apps will be more available to the general public.
Look at all those points.

What makes this game annoying is that it gets really repetitious, terribly fast. Especially if you try to get 3 stars on every level. Attempting to get 3 stars can usually only be achieved by hitting a certain block just right, and it will take you forever. But I guess it is primarily based on your opinion, and whether billions of the same level will tire you, or leave you in a state of eternal ecstasy (not the drug). 


This is going to hurt.
So Angry Birds gets a 6/10 in gameplay, because it offers infinite gaming, but I don't really know if you want that much gameplay. And the story is illogical. The frog pig things took like, three eggs. Birds lay like 9000 eggs every day. In fact, one of the birds in the game uses an egg, to slaughter some of the pigs. Those birds just need to chill out, and settle down. Quit being so angry.
It gets a 5/10 in youshouldgetthisapp, because It can be fun, and all of your frineds have it, so you should have it too. Right? And it's only a dollar, quit being so cheap.
It gets a 1/10 in bearness. For three reasons.
  1. There are no bears featured in this game. Not even a little bear. There are birds, and weird pig things. Both are very un-bear-like.
  2. They always work in teams. How can they resemble TLB if they work in teams? Unreal.
  3. The reason it has one out of ten instead of zero is because you do end up slaughtering small animals. Very bear-like.
Overall, It is an occasionally fun, but mediocre app. I would recommend it, but not to anybody I know.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Arkham City

I guess it was a year or two ago, there was the greatest Batman game ever, Arkham Asylum. The graphics were too good. Far too good. Anyway, the sequel is coming out soon, and an awesome trailer came out today. Forget everything you know about the Dark Knight, because this throws that into the shadows. So I will probably write a review of Arkam Asylum later, but for now, you need to see this video. And also check out the teaser trailer. It's probably on the side. But these games are dark, and everything you cannot get from the theaters. Just keep in mind while watching this that this is a video game. Unreal.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Battle Bears -1 Review!

The greatest app of all time, Battle Bears! This is the story of Oliver, a young bear, who while traveling on the Battle Bear space vessel, was stormed by thousands of small pink bears, called "huggables". Because they try to hug you. to death. Anyway, he any his brother are called to the bridge, and he has to fight his way there, after his brother, Will, is shot in the leg. Then they pretty much take the scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, where the concorde was shot with the arrow. ("Actually, I think I'm all right to come with you--") It's quite amusing, the cut scenes and everything. So anyway, You fight through these rooms, with all sorts of weapons, against all sorts of bears, and try to make it to the bridge.
I give it a 9/10 in gameplay, because it is really very fun, and the rooms are always changing. you will never have the same experience twice, and the 3D graphics really make it top-notch. There is the campaign, survival, and boss training, which give you endless bear fun. The cut-scenes were a little bit strange, because the mouths did not actually move, put the were still done surprisingly excellent.  Also It has an awesome soundtrack, which you can find here. Also the controls to the game are quite simple.
It also gets a 10/10 in youshouldgetthisapp, because it is free, and the greatest thing ever. There are achivments, and it uses Open Feint, so you get achivments and there are scoreboards.
It also gets a Billion/10 on bearness, because It contains only bears, and most are the time you are playing as A LONE BEAR. All apps from here on put will be also rated on bearness.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Lookalikes!

Well! As I mentioned, I am going to post more often. They might not all be an elaborate photoshop thing, or a long essay, but some internainment is better than none. right?
World Domination? Good Idea.
 Anyway, I figured out that not only do Lex Luthor and Benito Mussolini look almost identical, but they both want/wanted the same thing! To destroy Superman! No wait, To rule the world! It is also quite amazing how similar these two photos look similar. Also! some comments suggested that I do some kind of app reviews, which is quite fitting, now that I have an app accessible iPod! So also, I added some fish to the right-hand toolbar. If you want to suggest a color for the fish, I can changed them, and you will be cordially mentioned, if you leave a name to give credit to. You can leave a comment, or email The Lone Bear at thelonebearishere@gmail.com . You can suggest an article topic, or just give feedback. Because that would be cool.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Years! and/or SentrySafe!

Ok, so my new years resolution is to post more on my blog, in a simultaneous attempt to both capture the attention of new peoples, and to give the few followers something to tell all of their friends about, and to comment, and subscribe, and things. I might also make a facebook page for The Lone Bear, but only if people would actually, like, post and stuff. anyway. If you think it's a good idea, post in the comments. Anyway, I was in the store the other day, and I saw this safe, they actually had a few in various sizes for various purposes. Ok, that makes sense.

Waterproof and fireproof. That's pretty cool. Although if you look in the corner you might notice something odd about that picture.

The fireman is showing you that even though the container is chared, the files are still good. But wait, what's that in the background? The fire is still going on. From this picture, I can only assume that everything about this product is incorrect. How do I know if it is actually fireproof? the fire is certainly not real, and I doubt that guy is actually a fireman at all. I just don't know what to believe in anymore.